A year later

Days and months passed and then suddenly an entire year had flown by and God had not yet seen fit to give us a child. I struggled a bit - but kept reminding myself He is in control. Because He is. In all things God is with us no matter what. I had a friend text me on Mother's Day of this year to tell me she was praying for me. She had no idea what had been going on, but I was thankful that God laid it on her heart to reach out to me.
In February of 2015, I decided that I would not let my weight be a factor in having a child. I didn't want to wonder "if if just lost the weight would that help". So I began to exercise and eat better (and eventually lost 70 lbs in 2015).
By the time I went to see my Dr. she was thrilled with the weight I had lost (about 40 lbs at that point!) She and I discussed everything and she told me to really begin tracking my cycles. I had just recently started taking my temperature and taking ovulation tests. She told me to keep that up for 3 more months and then we would go from there. So I did. I tracked everything and recorded but still nothing. My tests were negative. In the midst of those I even had a few times where I took a pregnancy test just hoping, but they were negative. I clung to scripture at this point. Anytime my mind would wander to negative thoughts and doubt I just clung to the knowledge that God is good. He knows what is best for J and I.
I have been very fortunate to be able to talk to my mom and sister about everything too. Knowing they have been praying for me has meant the world. But finally the three months passed and it was time to begin testing.